Just a Moment

Life exists like the seasons.

Spring’s rain brings growth to life but can also drown it when it rains too heavily. Summer’s warmth brings ease but can also scorch what’s been growing. Autumn’s change brings beauty but quickly fades into mire. Winter’s snow temporarily covers what’s dead until the seasons start over, and we grow and die all over again.

In each season, through the growing and dying, we can wonder where God is. Why do some prayers feel like a vapor and others like God is sitting right there with you? Or when someone stays sick after you’ve begged God for a miracle. Maybe you’ve prayed for years about something, and you’re still waiting or stopped and gave up. Wondering why God feels present in some of life’s seasons and absent in others.

Kind of like Esther’s story. She was an orphaned Jew adopted by her cousin Mordecai who then became a queen and a hero to the Jewish people of her time, and even us today as we read of her bravery and faith. Her life was hard, painful and probably not ideal, yet she lived through her painful seasons of life with purpose and strength.

During Esther’s life, young virgin women were gathered to be prepared for months for the king reigning at the time. Some scholars believe this was an act of sex trafficking, considering most women were young teenagers, and the king was likely in his 40s and was potentially sleeping with each one until he chose his new queen. Esther, being the most beautiful woman out of all the other girls being groomed for the king with special diets and beauty treatments, captured the king’s desire to become his new queen.

But why did the king need a new queen? His current queen, Vashti, was very beautiful and desirable. Enough so that he threw a huge party with endless wine and riches, wanting to show her off to everyone, probably naked, according to some scholars. Do you know what Vashti did? She said no! To her king! Not only did that anger him, it made other royal officials afraid that their wives would resist their orders and they demanded Queen Vashti be punished and new laws written to make men the masters of their home and wives.

“On the seventh day, when the king was feeling good from the wine, Ahasuerus commanded Mehuman, Biztha, Harbona, Bigtha, Abagtha, Zethar, and Carkas—the seven eunuchs who personally served him—to bring Queen Vashti before him with her royal crown. He wanted to show off her beauty to the people and the officials, because she was very beautiful. But Queen Vashti refused to come at the king’s command that was delivered by his eunuchs. The king became furious and his anger burned within him.” Esther 1:10-12

I think we overlook Queen Vashti’s part in the Book of Esther. Can you imagine the kind of man King Ahasuerus was to her? Sleeping with teenagers, getting tipsy or drunk on wine, and then wanting to parade his naked wife to other men? He sounds like a monster that Queen Vashti was probably sick of. Good for her to respect herself and not allow men to sexualize her any more than she already was. Yes, Esther and Mordecai were history makers, but without Queen Vashti’s “no” to the king, Esther wouldn’t have been in a position to change history the way she did.

Now that Esther was the new queen, Mordecai challenged Esther to be brave in the face of death for herself and all her people, including Mordecai, because he refused to bow down to Haman, the newly appointed royal official with the highest ranking. This angered Haman so much that he plotted the destruction of all Jewish people. Some people believe this happened because of racism, being that Mordecai was a Jew and Haman’s father was an enemy to the Jews.

“When Haman saw that Mordecai was not bowing down or paying him homage, he was filled with rage. And when he learned of Mordecai’s ethnic identity, it seemed repugnant to Haman to do away with Mordecai alone. He planned to destroy all of Mordecai’s people, the Jews, throughout Ahasuerus’s kingdom.” Esther 3:5-6 

Esther and her cousin-turned guardian-Mordecai knew how to wait with faith in God’s promises, even with a painful past and fear for their future. They also knew when their waiting by faith had to turn into walking by faith. Not just trusting God would do something to save them, but doing what they could with what they were given in their current circumstances.

Mordecai told the messenger to reply to Esther, “Don’t think that you will escape the fate of all the Jews because you are in the king’s palace. If you keep silent at this time, relief and deliverance will come to the Jewish people from another place,   but you and your father’s family will be destroyed. Who knows, perhaps you have come to your royal position for such a time as this.” Esther 4:13-14 

Because Mordecai was faithful to remember and remind Esther of God’s promises, Esther fasted and had others fast for her instead of staying silent. She didn’t allow fear or doubt to overcome believing God was going to use her. God may have put her exactly where she was and because of everything she’d been through for such a time as that.

Did you know God is not mentioned at all in this story? So Esther’s courage to trust God was rooted only in what she remembered of God’s faithfulness, not what she was experiencing in her life at the moment. Her circumstances that looked only like a death trap caused the very same enemy who set the trap to be ensnared in his own trap. She hadn’t heard from God on what to do or what the outcome would be, yet His provision and power are all through her story.

“Harbona, one of the king’s eunuchs,   said, “There is a gallows seventy-five feet   tall at Haman’s house that he made for Mordecai,   who gave the report that saved   the king.” The king said, “Hang him on it.” They hanged Haman on the gallows he had prepared for Mordecai. Then the king’s anger subsided.” Esther 7:9-10  

Her story finishes with victory for herself and her people. Imagine the outcome if she hadn’t chosen bravery and trusted God and chose to remain silent and afraid. God may not have been commanding armies and providing miracles like He has for others in the past, but He still gave opportunities for faith with action to change history. That is a miracle itself.

Waiting faithfully for God to be there for you is possible in any season, even the silent seasons. How you wait in this moment today can determine what happens in the seasons to come. What are you planting or harvesting in life’s season for your “such a time as this” moment? Don’t pass up your purpose today because of the pain from yesterday. God is still working things together even when He feels absent.